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COOKIE (WHO WOULD NEVER BECOME OLD ENOUGH TO HAVE A BAT MITZVAH)... SEEN HERE ABOUT THREE MINUTES PRIOR TO WHAT WOULD BECOME HER HALF-SISTER, JUDY’S (BUT SEEN AS HER OTHER SELF GLADYS, THE SMOKING PUSSY) THIRD, FAILED ATTEMPT...

COOKIE (THINKING IT MIGHT HELP) HAVING BORROWED THE MISS DOG AMERICA CROWN FROM HER OTHER HALF-SISTER, HELEN ...

BUT, AS ALWAYS, THE PARTY BEGAN, THE VIRGIN ONCE AGAIN APPEARED IN THE TOP OF A TALL PECAN TREE - DISGUISED AS A GENERAL ELECTRIC REFRIGERATOR, WITH HER DOOR OPEN - LIGHT ON, AND GIVING SUPPORT TO A SPIRAL-CUT EASTER HAM TEETERING AND TOTTERING ON THE THIRD SHELF...

ALL THE CHILDREN ATTENDING WERE SCARED AWAY WHEN THE HAM FELL.... AND THAT WAS THE END OF THE SHOW.

JUDY’S (BUT SEEN AS HER OTHER SELF GLADYS, THE SMOKING PUSSY) ONLY COMMENT WAS THAT SHE DIDN’T GIVE A RAT’S ASS... THERE WAS ALWAYS NEXT YEAR...

IT WAS ALL VERY COMPLEX... ONE WOULD HAVE TO HAVE AT LEAST HALFWAY BEEN THERE...