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THE PREMIER NUT FARM APPEARANCE OF PEARL MCANDLISS

DURING EARLY FALL, RIGHT BEFORE THE TREES HAD DROPPED THEIR LOAD, PEARL HAD "ACCIDENTALLY" COME INTO PERCEPTIBLE EXISTENCE... STEPPING OUT OF THIN AIR FROM ANOTHER PLACE, PERHAPS EVEN ANOTHER TIME OR PLANE OF EXISTENCE. AFTER ALL, NAUGHTY BETTY (HAVING BEEN MORE "RANGY" THAN THE YOUNGER CHILDREN) HAD SWORN UP AND DOWN THAT JUST NORTH OF THE FARM - UP TOWARD BEAVER LAKE, THERE WAS A LESBIAN CONCLAVE CALLED "BEAVER SHORES"; THAT PERHAPS PEARL HAD BECOME SUBJECT TO SOME KIND OF COCKEYED QUANTUM ENTANGLEMENT AND HAD BEEN TELEPORTED FROM THERE...

PERHAPS SHE HAD SUCCUMBED TO AN HYPNAGOGIC STATE UNDER ANESTHESIA DURING A COMPLEX OVERHAUL OF HER NASAL FRAMEWORK AND HER ASTRAL BODY GOT LOOSE.

WHO REALLY NOSE? DOG KNOWS!

IT WAS AN ABSOLUTELY UNEXPLAINED GLITCH REQUIRING THAT ONE BE PRESENT IN ORDER TO EVEN BEGIN TO COMPREHEND...